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Courtney's avatar

I was left to make this decision at 17 and borrowed money I never should have. I’d had a full ride offer elsewhere but was nervous to go that far away. I ended up in college debt for 25 years for a fucking bachelors. You’re doing it right Dana, thanks for this essay.

Dana DuBois's avatar

Ugh, I’m so sorry. The system truly is so messed up and the risks are so high. I just published another essay that’s more Advice than memoir on this same topic. I’d be eager to hear your thoughts.

Courtney's avatar

Thanks Dana I will check it out. Your essays on this are so on point for me as well as the Gen X / dating grief one. Seriously had me digging deep in my own memories and tapping into things I hadn’t thought of or realized in ages. Grateful for your writing!

Lynette's avatar

I have been singing , doe a 🦌 deer a female deer lol from sound of music 🎶 lol 😂

Linnea_at_large's avatar

My niece just graduated from college TODAY! I say congratulations and wish her the best, but in the back of my mind I am just worrying about the state of the world. I know my sister has done everything to set her up for success, but still...

Laura Tompkins's avatar

Went through the process with my 2 adult children. My son, 6 years older, finished and is doing great in life. My daughter spent one year in college and quit. Lost so much money. Now, she and her husband are finally struggling. Great full for my 3 grands. My Oldest grandson is 19, my granddaughter is 16. Very focused on their futures. My daughter and I haven't spoken in 2 years. My Son in law is wonderful, so are my 3 grandson. Heartbroken about my daughter, but I will love her forever, even though I don't understand her withdrawal from me.

Lynette's avatar

That sounds so hard Laura. My mother and father in law were estranged from us but we always left the door open and they sent my husband a letter and we are rebuilding. My best “advice” is leave the door open if you want a future relationship and do the work you need to do whether they walk through the door or not.

Laura Tompkins's avatar

Thank you, Lynette. The door is ALWAYS open. She knows that. My love for her is absolute. And it hurts beyond measure. I've finally begun to understand that, just as I have, she needs to do whatever work is necessary for her to love herself. I can't fix that. But, she knows I'm here. No matter what. Without judgment. 💕

Lynette's avatar

she is lucky to have you holding that door open :)

Laura Tompkins's avatar

SO tired. Couldn't stay awake for live podcast..read the essay when you submitted it. It was excellent. See you at Sunday Salon!